Back from nowhere into nothingness

I just got back from Amsterdam yesterday, and as usual the space in between being somewhere and coming back has left me stranded with multiple confusing thoughts and feelings and a crapload of things to do. I’ll try to break this down for you.

1 – WordPress has changed it’s theme, which confused me at first and will need some getting used to. Then I thought: some change can do good, and since I’m in a place right now where everything seems cluttered, I wanted to clean up the theme of my blog. Since I don’t have time to sort out the ever fleeting space in my apartment, I can at least simplify my space on line. Sadly, I can’t influence the widgets at the bottom, otherwise I would have picked other ones. But I do like the neat one column appearance.

2 – I haven’t written a post in over a week, that has never happened before. But I must say, spending those days abroad with no internet whatsoever was actually kind of nice. Because even though the weather was harsh (I’ll write about my trip with more details shortly), we went out and experienced the world around us rather than living virtually. I also turned of my phone and only watched very little television in the evening, when we were to exhausted to do anything else. And that goes a long way coming from me.

3 – Culture shock. It’s for one the name of a book I bought for my mom for Christmas (psst!) and also the experience I had – not in Holland, but coming back. The deal is this: my mom might be moving to Germany, so I bought her this guide to the German way of life. It describes how the Germans and the country runs, what’s important, etc. Being a sort of foreigner myself, I was always torn between trying to fit in and prove that I was a “real German” and keeping the parts of me that were different. Since The BF is also trying to connect with his other nationality, this lead to many discussions about the different cultures and people. What I learned is this: I had never stopped and looked at Germany to see if it would suit me. I just wanted to get out of France, because I knew I didn’t feel at home there. But reading about the people here and experiencing the Dutch, I’m starting to wonder if this environment is really where I should be settling in. And I know we were only there for five days, and you can’t compare a vacation with actually living in a country, but it has definitely got me noticing and thinking about things.

4 – This is a huge sum up of what’s going on. I could go much more in detail and I’m leaving many things out, but I just don’t have the time. Have to get back to work now (which also includes such mundane things as unpacking and buying food) – learn for exams, clear up things concerning my diploma thesis (yes, that’s still running), catch up with friends, get the last Christmas presents before I go home next Monday, and other miscellaneous stuff – so see you soon.


One thought on “Back from nowhere into nothingness

  1. hello sweetheart, can’t wait to hear about your trip. i like the new theme but am sad to find that your link to me has now been moved all the way to the unattractive bottom of cloud razors (which is totally unlike your obviously very scrumptious one =p).
    as for culture shock, you’re almost sure to enjoy this blog which is all about an american experiencing the many quirks and weirdnesses of ze tchermans: (i love your title)

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